Balance Rhythm: Letting Go

I am working towards my 200 hr Yoga certification. This weekend, just like many others I went into my next training. I was exhausted when I got there after being up since 12 am that day to be able to catch a train to NY. But after all that I was late. The teacher asked if I just came in and my monologue in my head started. It was mostly thinking well yes, is not that obvious. And at that moment I decided that I want to turn around and go home. I settled down and then stepped out to get a drink of water. Meanwhile, I was thinking why was I so quick to want to go home. All the teacher asked is if I just arrived. But I was so quick to become negative and think that somehow that was a negative remark. I know this particular situation might sound silly but there are plenty of others – getting anxious in a grocery store line, honking at someone in traffic, getting upset with your boss for giving you an assignment that is due today while it is already 6pm, and the list goes on and on – where we all take it a bit too far while associating past encounters with present and clinging to that familiar yet not longer feeling of being somehow a victim and no one likes us, or understands us, or appreciates us. But why we are so quick to believe in a negative and why do we not stop even for a brief moment and think and just breath. That is what I did.

I was late, yes. There are other people and they were on time so the class cans tart on time and end on time. I though why was  I so negative, so I said to myself whatever reason from the past I will not let it ruin my day today. I will enjoy all that the day has to bring and look forward excited and enchanted on what this new teacher has to give. And the truth is, every teacher I had something new and exciting to share. Weather it was a new approach, a new detail about a pose, or just a simple way this particular person looks at life, training, and communication. I know that this time I won the battle and won just another present, a present of being of being in the moment and enjoying it to the fullest.

The truth is we all hold on to our preset ways. Ways that served us well in the past to be able to cope with whatever today or tomorrow brings. But do not let the familiarity to fool you into the false sense of comfort because if it was comfort and true spirit you will not be wanting what your friend or co-worker or just someone whom you saw in a store has. You will be content and happy and joyful with what you have. Are your? Really?

However, change does not come fast, you have to put work if you want to reap the benefits. I found myself sometimes slipping back. That is when I look back at the situation and examine why. Why was I jealous of someone I do not even know? Why was I short with my a family member? I look back see and evaluate. And what I always find is that it was because I did not take the time for myself to mediate and to pray; thus, eventually, I got caught up just again in a turmoil of life. I neglected the most important things by not stopping and slowing down just even for 15 minutes a day to appreciate and be grateful for all I that I have.

Svetlana

P.S. Eventually if you pay attention to yourself and take the time to find out just how amazing and that body and mind and soul of ours is, you will find the strength that is within each and everyone of us and it will amaze you just how fortunate you are and how much you have to give.