Yoga and My Journey to Self

Hi guys,

I am so excited. Today I had my audition at the YMCA for a yoga instructor opening. Rachel was so sweet and kind (I got the job).

The back story to this is that I am going for the 200 hour yoga alliance certification through YogaFit and part of the requirement is to volunteer for at least 8 hr and bring the joy of yoga to the greater community and YMCA, being a non-profit and taking into consideration their community and family oriented approach, it is a perfect combination.

The truth be told, it took me 15 years to be able to enjoy Sivasana – the final relaxation. I never would have imagined to be so comfortable in allowing my body and  mind to relax without feeling that I am being lazy and a constant nagging that I am doing nothing and have to get going to be all sweaty and in pain. That said, I do enjoy getting sweaty and love my HIT workouts. However, it is through the practice of yoga that I am able to bring my attention to the present and get better results when I am working out. Because it is only when you are conscious and aware of what you are doing at the present moment, it is only then you will be able to rip the best and biggest results because you will be engaging all the right muscles, you will be guided by your breath through the hard and sticky parts of the exercise, and you will not be distracted and thinking that you have another 50 set to go so you will be able to give 100% all the time. End result, less work more results.

Moreover, the ability to take on the challenges help me off the mat. Making my yoga practice come alive in real life and becoming a better christian. By no means, I am not perfect but with time I’ve noticed the patterns that my brain creates, the drama that it wants, the negative thought patterns, and the way it reacts to certain situation because of past experiences. I’ve noticed that it became a heavy burden on my shoulders, weighing me down with it worthless non-stop thinking, and literally becoming pain in my neck and shoulders from the tension that it creates. It actually prevents  me from being and enjoying the present. I have a long way to go but I know that I can get there. I’ve seen and felt the presence of wholeness within me. The patience, love, compassion, tenderness, and gratitude that takes over the moment I stop and breath. The moment I take the time to appreciate the resent without judgment. When I take the time to absorb what is vs what was or what I think it will be, both are not real. One is past and it already happened and nothing can be done, the other it future which is surreal and only fiction of my mind. Of course there are non fictional items – I know I need to work to make money and provide for my family, I know I need to pay my bills so debt collectors do not come, yes those are tangible – but I am talking about million of fictional situations that our mind conjures and  makes u believe it is all real. While the only thing that is real is now, that moment.

So, coming back to my Yoga training. I had a great honor to be taught by so many wonderful, talented, and generous teacher at YogaFit. I made friends and was able to connect to people that I never new before but they were generousness and kind and listened to me giving me their attention and love and compassion. It is a wonderful feeling to be understood and supported. I also matured in my practice. For example, I always had trouble with pigeon or lotus poses thinking my be it has to do more with bone structure but in reality after taking an absolutely transformation hip and heart opener class I was so light I felt like I was not walking but rather floated though air. Event when I went for a walk during that day people around responded and felt my energy on a different level, I saw love and compassion. The thing is, when we are stuck and we go through life on autopilot we tend to store our energy (anxiety, tension, being closed of after a heartbreak) in our body. We feel our back hurting, we feel our heart closed of and we are walking around hunched over and with our shoulder raised. That becomes our reality, we are so used to it that we think it is normal. I found out it does not have to be and that it life is full of beauty and I so looking forward to share that feeling and it will be such an honor if I can even touch a lief of person. Because happiness is contagious you touch one they touch someone else – may be they will not pick a fight with a spouse or child that night, and the spouse will not be upset the next and pick on their co-worker or the child will not bully another kid at school. Eventually, it will take a life of its own in the big field of universe energy that is around us and it will become a domino effect and just like that we are making a difference among pain, hurt, and strugle.

Namaste,

Svetlana

FYI: This is the first time I put “Namaste” at the end of any of my communications because it is only recently that I truly started to comprehend its meaning. I am bowing to the world, to people, to the universe, to divine within each and everyone of us. Oh my, I have so much to learn but it feels great to actually have a chance to do it.

Here is my son and I taking a painting class. It is amazing to be able to connect with him and share quality time together.